The choices I would like to make


After years of keen observation on life, I understood my future was not written before I took shape in my mum’s womb, instead it is determined by my decision on the innumerable choices that nature presented in front of me. Every choice displayed had an undisclosed path to take me to some set future. The beauty of life is that one is absolutely free to choose any option as long as he/she is ready to face the aftermath. Even this moment presents us with ‘n’ number of choices. You can either chose honest path or dishonest path. Criminal path or otherwise. Etc.

Well, I stop it here as my intention is not to bore you with dry philosophical stuff. Instead, I would like to share with you the choices that I would like to make in my life. This may be relatively interesting I suppose.

I am not politically correct person or a fake modest person to ignore the importance of money. I am so adamant in saying that, money is the one which sets most of the problems right. But I am verywell aware that there is also life after money. The hunt for money itself is a huge activity which teaches lots of points on our life. I only want to treat earning money as a tool to understand life and to fulfill my honest needs but I am sure I don’t want to get intoxicated by it.

I visited a handful of western countries and I even had a chance to settle in one of them but I chose not to do that because of my own reasons. If my friend’s house is neat and clean compared to my home, I cant choose to stay there, instead I would like to clean my home. My country is dirty and low compared to many of the western countries and so I want to contribute my bit to clean it now. I believe all the misery this country faces is because of the ignorance of our people. I want to start a non political organization to make people politically eligible, to educate them on culture, confidence, freedom and how to think on their own etc. I am even ready to spend most of my earnings to improve the mental standard of our people which is at the moment filled with ignorance and selfishness. Hope this dream would come true someday.

Recently I notice few strange observations within me. Whenever I complain of something about someone, I feel I have the same complaint within me. When I say some one is adamant, I feel I am adamant too. Recently I complained a person that she is adamant and always wants others to adjust to her character. I advised her to change this attitude. Later on the rebel (yeah, the same rebel who peeked in my WHAT IS LOVE post :-)) inside me said aren’t you doing the same with her pal’. I started feeling all the happiness and sadness has something to do with our mind inside. So I would like to choose to allot some time to explore and give some exercise to my mind. I don’t know how much yoga and meditation can help, but decided to take it up. I also decided to give some exercise to my body which is relatively slower than my mind.

I wanted to learn the art of loving people, with all their differences.

I want to treat insult as like just another incident.

If I feel like crying I should be able to cry without any ego as I am a man.

I want to have my policies of honesty and straightforwardness unaffected by the pressures of money that my peers and other money fetishes insist on me.

So far I understood that we cannot avoid problems in life. Now I want to know how I could handle these problems in such a way that it doesn’t bother me.

I want to be flexible enough to accept new ideologies that help me learning the life better. (Remember the Zen story in my PERCEPTION post).

I believe family and friends are the set up created to understand the meaning of loving people. I want to use this opportunity to learn that art.

I want to understand and pay respect to those ailing elders who wants none other than a visit. I want to do this atleast once a week.

I don’t want to do anything to impress anyone. Be it a high post official or powerful politician or filthy rich money fetish or a beautiful girl, I want my behavior to be very natural.

I dont mind questioning even if it concerns God (which made me an agnostic). I want to keep it this way.

I understood its only me who prompts others to behave in a particular way with me. And also I know its only me who is going to take or reject the effects of what is said to me. I want to understand this and alter my mind such a way that I am unaffected by external environment.

Finally I will give a small story to wake you up reading such a long philosophical crap.

Once a lady in a small village got pregnant illegally. Fearing the wrath of her family against her clandestine lover, in front of all the villagers, she pointed out a good zen monk in that village as the culprit. He was a very nice monk with all the good name until then. After hearing this from the lady, almost all the villagers hated and insulted him.

The father of that lady took the baby to him and said, “you are the culprit and you have to take care of him”

The monk said. “is it? Alright” with a smiling face.

A year passed, pushed by guilt, the lady revealed the truth that the zen monk had nothing to do with the child. Learning this, the father and villagers ran to the monk and fell on his feet begging pardon saying all the truth.

The monk said, “Is this. Alright” with a smiling face.

I want to be like that monk. Unaffected by the highs and lows.

Now the choice infront of me is, I can either spend my energy to do all this or spend my time lazying around. My future is in my hand now as usual.

Image courtesy: http://www.evolvingtimes.com/wp-content/uploads/2009/04/choices-for-deliberate-creators.jpg




41 comments:

Shankar said...
August 25, 2009 at 8:17 PM

hey..very nice post....

you know bharathi..I always believe that when we scold someone for their behavior or deeds..or whenever you are complaining to others..I feel like god is saying..you are doing the same mistake..SO what I do is I will correct myself first... and whenever I complain i analyze did i make such mistakes..and would try to rectify that... I would say Its just an opportunity given by god (and if you dont believe in god..assume it as some unknown force)to correct ourselves..I think this is the best way to tell us we have complaints within ourselves...

crying is a bit difficult things of course....

wow..I too like to question...even if it concerns god....

ha..ha... for that you have to be a monk bharathi....nice short story...

nice post...

Bharathi said...
August 25, 2009 at 8:24 PM

@ Shankar: From your comment I understood that you read this post untill end. I thought this will be boring crap and will stepout half way through. Thanks a lot for not doing that and your wonderful comment.

Reg 'complaining others' mistakes' I believe, we complain only because we are faulty, otherwise we woudnt.

Amit414@IT-BHU said...
August 25, 2009 at 9:18 PM

very nice introspective post...:)

well, we are served with choice.

But can we figure out, the choice we are making are action rather than reaction(due to social orthodox and prejudices)?

Some one has said that there is only one advantage of being millionaire and that is realization of futility of money.I am not solely agree but after a certain extent I agree.
I do agree
Happiness and sorrows are options of one's mind to a great extent.

I really admire u for what u wish...

it's really a nice story. I have heard it in OSHO's discourses.

cheers!!!

Shilpa said...
August 25, 2009 at 9:26 PM

"If my friend’s house is neat and clean compared to my home, I cant choose to stay there, instead I would like to clean my home."

====>indeed a great thought. And if you really mean to start an organization then you must actually go for it{i know it easier said than done,though}.And last but not the least in today's times being like that monk can only happen if you are a character of a story.. right?

Vipul Grover said...
August 25, 2009 at 11:41 PM

One, I read tht post without a brk..

Two, I dont know wat i'll say!

Hmmmmm....

U r definitely going thru a lot of introspection nd want 2 do a lot.. And that 'a lot' is vry positive.. for both u nd ppl around u..

Just make a strt frm sumwhere.. visiting the elderly will b an easier option 2 atleast strt.. Um sure u'll gradually succeed in doing evrything u want..

U mite nvr bcm tht monk (nd thrs no need 4 d same)bt u shud still try reaching tht state of mind.. u might not reach it bt will get closer to it. nd thts wat u shud target at..

Its time 4 self-actualization.. All d best:)

VISHNU said...
August 26, 2009 at 1:27 AM

wat makes u to think tht the post was boring.. it was interesting indeed.. n we r here to read ur philosophy.. so plz dont stop..

jus 1 small doubt abt a fellow blogger..
r u married??

http://whysoserioustoday.blogspot.com said...
August 26, 2009 at 6:12 AM

Interesting :)
so much goin around in there... i kinda agree wid u in lots of points ... abt our country n money for sure ... I also believe tht choices we make dictate the life we lead ...
but i have a doubt here ... like u said u wana be like the monk n accept thngs n u oso wana change thngs ... well there is a possibility tht u wana change thngs in polite manner ... bt acceptin everythn ... wont du ne gud here !!! esp if we wana improve our country n...nt everythn or everyone is worth acceptance ... improvement is necessary for sure :)

Bharathi said...
August 26, 2009 at 10:48 AM

@ Amit: I am glad that you liked this post. I think no one can escape from reacting for situations entrusted on us. May be we can use a more positive word responding instead of reacting. But again for responding we have more choices and we get based on what we choose.
Regarding futility of money, well I am not a millionaire now but I would be glad to reciprocate the same thought after being one ;-)
Few zen stories made me think a lot and this is one among them. I am glad that you liked it too.
Great comment pal. You ve made me to think for replying this. Thanks and keep commenting.

@ Shilpa: I am happy that you liked my ideas. Regarding attaining the mindset of a monk, that is one of my objective. If nature wants me to become a monk to achieve that, why not? Glaring head with single piece saffron cloth might be interesting ;-) (My wife may launch a fight if she reads this :D)

@ Vipul: I am happy that you read it without a break. I always love introspecting as this helps me to understand my own self and others around me. Yeah I plan to do one by one right from today may be from visiting elders. Thanks for your wishes. By the way I m just curious to know what made you to think that I will never become a monk (see, I ve given you a chance to increase your comments count ;-))

@ Vishnu: I am a kind of strict reader. When ever I read a long post, I always try to run away unless otherwise I m hooked to it. I feel all readers are similar. I think this is one of the longest post I ve ever written as this covered two pages in MS word sheet. But any way I am happy to know that our valuable readers didn’t feel that way. Thanks a lot.
And yeah Im married. (Are you asking this because of lot of philosophical stuff I write :-)

@ Suga: Thanks. I am happy that this post interests you.
You raised a very valid point. Zen says, accept everything as it is. I asked the same question, if we accept everything as it is, then where will be growth. I still haven’t got an answer.
However here in this story, I want to gain a mindset which will keep me stable in ups and downs of life. Hope you understood.

Lakshmi Rajan said...
August 26, 2009 at 2:21 PM

Self realizations starts with realizing oneself. There is lots to learn from within us before we start searching outside us. Nice to read n peak into your mind process...

Have you read "athanikum assaipadu" by Jaggi Vasudev? If u get time , do try reading it.

Zephyr Girl said...
August 26, 2009 at 4:11 PM

Hi,
i just visited your blog, its really wonderful. If we work together, we have a wonderful opportunity for you to make money with your blog. If you are interested please do reply. I will be happy to explain. Its a lot of fun and its not a lot of work either. So please do reply.

Bharathi said...
August 26, 2009 at 4:58 PM

@ Lakshmi Rajan: I completely agree with your first para.

And yes I read athanaikum aasaipadu, unakagavae oru ragasiyam, gnanathin bramandam, many more books and CDs of Jagi.

Swami vivekananda thaught me basics of spirituality. Osho and Budha took me deeper and Jagi brought out the best in me.

@ Zephyr Girl: The objective of this blog is not commercial. How ever if your offer doesnt create any trouble to my readers like irritating popups or anything like that, I can consider. Thanks.

Shankar said...
August 26, 2009 at 5:58 PM

Bharathi: i dont know whether your post is boring or interesting.... But I like such posts always... these sorts of introspection are always special and good(according to me) than the fictions...

Bharathi said...
August 26, 2009 at 6:17 PM

@ Shankar: I am glad that you like interospection. I would be even more glad if you say you do it to your self as this teaches a lot about life.

Vipul Grover said...
August 26, 2009 at 7:52 PM

Lol.. thnx 4 giving me d opporrtunity 4 increasing my cmmnts :)
See, bharathi, the monk u r talking about is an IDEAL TYPE.. Sch stories r made 2 inspire ppl 2 reach tht ideal type.
It cn nvr b reachd bt d effrt 2 reach it is in itslf vry humbling nd noble.
Moreovr, evn if it cn b reachd, thrs no need to reach it...do u really want 2 b calld a mahatama.. d effrt 2 purify ur atma is enuf :)

Shruti said...
August 26, 2009 at 10:57 PM

Bharathi
its indeed a great post!
SELF-ANALYSIS is what you have done.. I loved each and every point!

i had a self analysis and ended up in questioning myself!!
when will i be a human being?!
It is when am away from ego,greed and lust. this is a practical stuff. i always try to keep away from these.although in some situations , a feeling of ego does creep into me but i control it.being a good human being is just like fighting with oneself to conquer bad qualities.it is good to help others but unfortunately when you start helping others ,they start taking your unjust advantage and consider you as a fool.but i always try to help others but in a limited way.

Arnav said...
August 27, 2009 at 12:29 AM

True very true ..
Being indifferent is a great road to happiness .


Keep Writing and Smiling
Arnav

Bharathi said...
August 27, 2009 at 9:41 AM

@ Vipul: At the moment I am trying to become a monk (I mean monk mindset). I will let you know if I reach there. :-)

@Shruti: I am glad that this post made you to do a self analysis. I think we all are human beings who are not perfect. Our job is to become a better human beings by sacrificing a bit of something. I believe you have taken first effort to it by self analysing. All the best.

@ Arnav: I am gald that you agree to this point. Thanks a lot.

Sat_hi_sh said...
August 27, 2009 at 12:34 PM

i like the way how you put things across in ur blog bharathi [:)]

but if you cud avoid long paragraphs in ur posts it wud be much easier to go through......its jus wat i tot....i leave the decision to you

anyways keep up ur good work[:)]

Bharathi said...
August 27, 2009 at 4:38 PM

@ Sathish: I will take your point. thanks.

gnani said...
August 27, 2009 at 6:49 PM

நல்ல படங்கள் வரவேண்டுமென்று எங்களைப் போல உங்களுக்கும் ஆசை உண்டா? அப்படியானால் தொடர்ந்து படியுங்கள்....

நம்மில் பலர் நல்ல படங்களுக்கு ஏங்குகிறோம். நம் வாழ்க்கையை மேலும் அர்த்தமுள்ளதாக்கும் கதைகள் எவ்வளவோ உண்டே, அவையெல்லாம் ஏன் படமாவதில்லை என்று ஏங்குகிறோம். அப்படிப்பட்ட கதைகள் ஏராளமாகத் தமிழிலும் பிற மொழிகளிலும் இருந்தாலும், அவற்றைப் படமாக்க ஏற்ற வணிகச் சூழல் இங்கே இல்லை.

எனவே அதற்கு வெளியில் ஒரு மாற்றுச் சூழலை உருவாக்கக் களம் இறங்கியிருக்கும் கோலம் இயக்கம், வருடத்துக்கு மூன்று முதல் ஐந்து முழு நீள வீடியோ படங்களைத் தயாரிக்க விரும்புகிறது. இது சாத்தியம்தானா ? நல்ல படங்கள் வரவேண்டுமென்று ஆசைப்படும் ஆயிரக்கணக்கானவர்கள் ஒவ்வொருவரும் தங்கள் பங்களிப்பைப் படம் வருவதற்கு முன்பே அளித்தால் சாத்தியம்.

நீங்கள் செய்ய வேண்டியது என்ன ? முதல் படத்தின் டி.வி.டிக்கான முன்பதிவு தொகையாக ஐநூறு ரூபாய்களை செப்டம்பர் 15, 2009க்கு முன்னதாக எமக்கு அனுப்பவேண்டும். அக்டோபரில்¢ படப்பிடிப்பைத் தொடங்குவோம். நவம்பரில் படம் முழுமையாகி அதன் ஒரிஜினல் டி.வி.டி உங்கள் வீட்டுக்கு நேரடியாக வந்து சேரும்.

இதே போல மூன்று மாதங்களுக்கு ஒரு முறை சில ஆயிரம் பேர் ஆளுக்கு ஐநூறு ரூபாய் அனுப்பி டி.வி.டி முன்பதிவு செய்தால்..... தொடர்ந்து தமிழிலும் பிற மொழிகளிலும் உள்ள நல்ல நாவல்கள், சிறுகதைகள், இன்றைய சமூகத் தேவைக்கு உகந்த படைப்புகள், அவற்றை உருவாக்கக் கூடிய புதுப் புது படைப்பாளிகள், கலைஞர்கள் நம் வீட்டுக்குள்ளேயே வந்து டி.வி.டிகளாக நம்மை சந்திப்பார்கள். படைப்¢பாளியும¢ பார்¢வையாளரும¢ நேரடியாக உறவு கொள்¢ளும¢ இயக்¢கமே கோலம்¢. எண்¢ணற்¢ற புள்¢ளிகளாக பார்¢வையாளர்¢கள்¢ இருக்கிறார¢கள்¢. இந்¢தப்¢ புள்¢ளிகளை இணைத்¢து ஒரு கோலம்¢ வரையும்¢ படைப்¢பாளிகளின் அமைப¢பு கோலம்¢.

இந்த முயற்சியைப் பற்றி உங்கள் ஒவ்வொரு நண்பருக்கும் சொல்லுங்கள். ஒவ்வொருவரையும் முன்பதிவு செய்து இந்தக் கனவு மெய்ப்பட, உதவச் சொல்லுங்கள். முக்கியமானது காலத்தே செய்யும் உதவி. எனவே செப்டம்பர் 15க்குள்¢ முதல் படத்துக்கான உங்கள் முன்பதிவுத் தொகைகள் எம்மை வந்து பிரமிக்கச் செய்யட்டும்.

ஊர் கூடி தேர் இழுப்போம்.

எப்படி பணம் அனுப்புவது ?

முன்பதிவுத் தொகையை (இந்தியாவுக்குள்: ரூ 500/-& வெளிநாடுகள்: அமெரிக்க டாலர் 15) கேட்போலைகள், காசுக்கட்டளை அஞ்சல்கள் அனைத்தும் ‘கோலம்’ பெயரிட்டு அனுப்ப வேண்டிய முகவரி: கோலம். மே/பா, ஞாநி 39 அழகிரிசாமி சாலை, கலைஞர் கருணாநிதி நகர், சென்னை 600078. செல்பேசி: 94440 24947. நேரடியாக கோலம், a/c no. 007705013590 ICICI K.K.Nagar branch என்ற வங்கிக்கணக்கிலும் பணம் செலுத்தலாம். பதிவு செய்யும்போது உங்கள் பெயர், வயது, பாலினம், தொழில், முகவரி, தொலை¢பேசி, செல்பேசி, மின்னஞ்சல, முதலிய விவரங்களை எங்களுக்குத் தவறாமல் தெரிவியுங்கள்.

VISHNU said...
August 27, 2009 at 8:49 PM

nope..i wonder hw married pple write such philosophical stuff.. u have already entered the cage..lol.. its us bachelors who have the liberty of writin it.. but do continue..
btw plz take this word verification thing off.. such an irritation..

Bharathi said...
August 27, 2009 at 9:05 PM

@ Vishnu: Bachelors hav liberty but only married knows the value of liberty :-)

Reg word verification, I will remove it now but if any spam comes in, I might hav to put it back.

Lakshmi Rajan said...
August 28, 2009 at 10:43 AM

@ Bharathi ,

Thats nice to kno that u have read so many books .. seems like avid book reader ! Good !

lol and ya u right on your reply to vishnu abt value of liberty. only married men knows the plus and minuses of BM AM , Before Marriage After marriage in true sense :p

Lakshmi Rajan said...
August 28, 2009 at 10:43 AM

@ Bharathi ,

Thats nice to kno that u have read so many books .. seems like avid book reader ! Good !

lol and ya u right on your reply to vishnu abt value of liberty. only married men knows the plus and minuses of BM AM , Before Marriage After marriage in true sense :p

Lakshmi Rajan said...
August 28, 2009 at 10:43 AM

@ Bharathi ,

Thats nice to kno that u have read so many books .. seems like avid book reader ! Good !

lol and ya u right on your reply to vishnu abt value of liberty. only married men knows the plus and minuses of BM AM , Before Marriage After marriage in true sense :p

Bharathi said...
August 28, 2009 at 3:29 PM

@ Lakshmi Rajan: Once I was an avid book reader but not now. especially after marriage my reading time reduced to at about half an hour to one hour a day. (probably theory part is over and we are experiencing practicals :-)

Shruti said...
August 29, 2009 at 6:49 PM

Bharathi,hi :)
Check out my recent post

The Survivor said...
August 30, 2009 at 6:09 PM

Conscious living, not that easy to live!!

Bharathi said...
August 31, 2009 at 12:02 AM

@ Survivor: Yeah I know but thats the objective. lets try :-)

bliss said...
August 31, 2009 at 6:10 PM

hey honestly great post. philosophical, yes. crap, NO WAY!!!! it was a great read. i really liked the way u put attitude leading to immigration in such simple words abt cleaning our home instead of living in frnd's cleaner house!!

Bharathi said...
August 31, 2009 at 9:56 PM

@ Bliss: Thanks a lot. Your comment made me happy.

Ashish said...
September 2, 2009 at 12:48 PM

Nicely said :). I agree with your perception on life.
I am following you :).
Do drop by Subliminal verses sometime.

pra said...
September 2, 2009 at 5:14 PM

I know what you mean by Not living in your friend's house. I have done the same. I came back as this is my home! I love India as it is.I will try and bring change to it.
I agree with you about the money as well. The monk story is really good. where do you get all these stories from?

Bharathi said...
September 2, 2009 at 8:20 PM

@ Ashish: welcome to this blog. I am happy that you liked these posts. Keep visiting and keep commenting. I vsited your blog and its quite nice. I left a comment in one of the posts too.

@Pra: I am happy to see a fellow ideologue. All the best on your efforts to chenge India.
I get the stories from the books I read. i read all sorts of books, history, philosophy, zen hinduism etc. I am glad you like my posts. Keep commenting and your comments helps me to write better.

Omar Saabith said...
September 9, 2009 at 1:24 PM

Hi,

First time in ur blog n just read this post. Some points relates to my situation. I am in a dilemma of whether to live in my friends clean house at a clean place or live at my own clean house which is in a very dirty place.

Do inform when you start the NON POLITICAL organization.Really wish to do my part for it :)

Bharathi said...
September 9, 2009 at 1:46 PM

@ Omar Saabith: Welcome to this blog and thanks for your nice comments pal. If I start, I will not do it with out an anouncement in this blog. Keep commenting. thanks again.

The abstract scientist said...
September 11, 2009 at 12:37 AM

I liked the honesty in your tone, the willingness to accept your limitations and your very thought to look within you to identify your self.

@not having an ego, being good not to impress others,
well, I have heard some monk say that 'all our actions are towards grabbing acceptance of your fello beings by default, but you shall be a better man when you align and prioritise your life with the one of God(whichver one you follow).

This is my view. i would like your view.

Bharathi said...
September 11, 2009 at 8:51 AM

@ abstract scientist: Thanks pal. Keep commenting.

Chandramouli said...
June 10, 2010 at 4:38 AM

Hi

I accidentally landed on this blog. One led to another. Very interesting and thoughtful comments. The one I liked most is visiting the elderly. Do keep up the good work. I am visiting my son in US right now. I am from Jakarta, Indonesia. Within the next two or three days, I hope to read all your blogs. Good luck and cheers. D. Chandramouli

Bharathi said...
June 14, 2010 at 3:18 PM

Your comments made me feel extra happy. and am even more happier to meet someone who can think about life. do leave your comments. I can reply if u hav any points to discuss.

Jasper said...
January 26, 2011 at 2:26 AM

In the topic "The choices I would like to make" you can add "Never lose a relationship between relatives, friends or 3rd persons due to our satisfaction of ego in a heat argument even if we fail to justify our thoughts and opinions."

Blog Widget by LinkWithin