What is love?

I was very bubbly and cracking jokes with my buddies on my trip to Munnar, until I heard this particular song ‘en veetu thotathil’ from film ‘Gentleman’. It took away all my enthusiasm but filled with a mysterious feeling which ignited butterflies in my stomach. It took me to a new world of imagination that filled with heart wrecking joy. I know why. It reminded me of my school days. I remembered the precious couple of hours when I got time to speak to her which contained no worthy topics. I remembered the nights that filled with the memories of the talking sessions. I could remember my successful chase of my moped with her car for a desperate attempt to get a glimpse and acknowledging smile. I know this is kind of weird behaviors that I followed then, but those behaviors gave immense pleasures those days that even abundance of money could not give today. The environment was so strong that even a song from that era has the power to give similar feelings. Will you call this feeling love?

Before a couple of days to my trip to Kodai, I was spending a full two days with my kid Nakshathira. She was completely with me that even to go to toilet I need to use my imagination to find excuses. She was sitting there in my office opposite to me for the whole day playing with my rubber bands and clips. I played with her ‘ringa ringa roses’, I participated in a running race where I ran slowly to let her win. (Occasionally I also won as I want her to understand reality). I kept her on my shoulder to let her have a nice glimpse of the procession going on the street. When I was in Kodai, my wife called and said she couldn’t handle her. She was true. I could hear her loud cry in the background. She snatched the phone from her mom and said amidst the cry that she needs me there now. And not a minute late. Is the feeling that I got after the phone call is love?

I remember the way my mother took care of me when I was sick for a while inspite of her rheumatoid arthritis painful fingers. The pride she shows in her eyes even for the smallest achievements her son gets. And all the sacrifice that she made so far for the betterment of her son. I don’t have to spend more words to explain a mothers affection as it is well understood. Is this love?

In a programme, under a hypothetical situation, I was supposed to write a letter to my beloved one from my death bed. For some reasons I chose to write to my father. And I cried while writing that letter. Yes, I cried after a long long time. I din’t know why. Is this feeling Love?

One of my good friends said he saw his old close associate in Madurai a while ago. He was married to a widow whom he loved and because of that he was chased away from home. He was leading a wonderful and luxury life before marriage and now he was suffering even for survival. My friend said, ‘Why didn’t he ask me for help'. He was even ready to offer some big money to get him a nice future. I became little sentimental after hearing this. Is this feeling love?

Few years back, myself and my friend developed an altercation with a bus driver for driving recklessly on the road. Unfortunately they developed a gang of twenty against us two. The situation became so intense that the argument will turn into a fight. From nowhere a gentle man of 45 years came from the crowd and said “don’t go beyond argument. What wrong that those guys said” and got us away from the site. I haven’t seen him before. I didn’t know why he supported us and rescued out of that mess. Is this called love?

I remembered all those nasty things I told to my wife. I don’t think anyone would take those ego shattering words so easily. If it was a friend I am sure he would have bid goodbye early. But she is with me all the time. Is this called love?

How can we call the affection that we show to our beloved ones as love? Isn’t that feeling comes because of the possessiveness and selfishness that they are ours? In other words, don’t we show that affection because we treat them as MY relatives? Isn’t that MY factor comes before love? So how can we call that as love? Love should accompany with no expectations and so the love shown by the stranger is the true one.

Once I finished writing this, the rebel inside me said, “Shut up. For once keep away from your maniac analysis. Whoever did whatever to keep anyone happy is love. Love is beyond analysis. Whoever spends time analyzing will never find time to love. Stop analyzing and start loving”

I believe for once the rebel inside me is right.


With all your encouragements and support, finally my illution that my writing has improved, may turn true. Yes. the previous post 'DOGS TOO DISCRIMINATE' got selected for BlogAdda's 'Spicy saturday pick' again on Aug 15. Thanks pals.

Image Courtesy: http://www.smashingapps.com/wp-content/uploads/2008/02/love-wallpaper.jpg


http://whysoserioustoday.blogspot.com said...
August 18, 2009 at 4:22 AM

It's hard for me to understand wat love is all about or may be coz i dunt wana understand it... feelin it is more fun ... This post me smile and the letter to father para made me emotinal ... loved it :)
beautiful ... n congrats for the selection of previous post :)

Bharathi said...
August 18, 2009 at 9:31 AM

@Suga: Thanks a lot for your comment. Even I am not very sure about love. This just a penultimate conclusion that I could arrive I suppose. And thanks for congratulating.

Shruti said...
August 18, 2009 at 2:28 PM

Hey Bharathi,
Good post again!!
after reading the first paragraph, i thought, "oh this is what love"!! After reading the consecutive paragraphs my opinion changed..
"How is my definition of love matches with this?"
"err....Mom,you were like this to me..i love you,but definition of love? matches :) i love mom"
"Do i love dad lik i do my mom...Hmm i do..but i love mom 1% more dan dad.."
"OMG I love my frens too!! How i for got them? But my definition stands nowhere near this! That means was i wrong?!"
"Am wrong..may be i can understand when i love some guy deeply..."
After reading the entire post,a chord struck me!
Finally ended up with a conclusion
""What most people need to learn in life is how to love people and use things instead of using people and loving things""

Btw, Please check out my new 55 Fiction

Vipul Grover said...
August 18, 2009 at 2:50 PM

Hey buddy, now this post is an answer to ur 'lessons from a dead body' post. A beautiful post nd i am vry happy tht u allowed the rebel inside u prevail though tht means i wont b gtting a chance 2 post more cmmnts as if the rebel hd faild, thn i wud hav rebled ;)

Love is love, evn if it cums attachd with the MY factor, it is love. Bcoz thr r also sch selfish ppl who wont care 4 their dear ones too.

Nd yeah, u rmmbr i wrote last time, um curious 2 c frm wat all 'dimensions' u rite about love. sumhow, i knew u'll b touching the love in all its aspects - parents, children, spouse, relatives, friends, stranger nd d cutest bt silliest, college one :)

The Survivor said...
August 18, 2009 at 9:43 PM

Deep Thoughts!!

Love is everything and yet nothing.

Its all about how one looks at it!!

Bharathi said...
August 18, 2009 at 9:49 PM

@Shruti: Very nice comment. It almost looked like a good post :-). Thanks a lot.

@Vipul: May be you can call this as a next step to the stance I took in dead body post. However this isnt final, I am sure there is a better solution than this. But thanks for bringing up the deadbody post again here. It indeed made me to think a while before writing a reply.
I am sorry that I coudnt help you beat Shankar in comments count. However better luck next time. :-)

'Nd yeah, u rmmbr i wrote last time, um curious 2 c frm wat all 'dimensions' u rite about love. sumhow, i knew u'll b touching the love in all its aspects - parents, children, spouse, relatives, friends, stranger nd d cutest bt silliest, college one :)'

This is what is called as deconstuctionism. You became an expert in judging a writer. (Finally I got a chance to call myself a writer :-) yeah)

Bharathi said...
August 18, 2009 at 9:50 PM

@Survivor: Thanks a lot pal for your nice comments.

Vipul Grover said...
August 18, 2009 at 10:04 PM

lol.. u bcam a writer nd i bcam a deconstruction expert ;)
No frankly, going by d name of ur blog, one mst xpct 'Naked' Truths out here bt 4 a change, sch posts full of love nd hope make a reader like me smile while 4 a while.. u really touched all d dimensions nd with it all d chords of a reader's heart:)

Bharathi said...
August 18, 2009 at 10:16 PM

@ Vipul:

When I started this blog, I decided to play around my positives. I am not good at mind grabbing narration or creative ideas or beautiful language. The only thing I am good at is 'writing truth'. that is quite simple. just write what ever comes to your mind. Its easy isnt it. I chose that easy path and so I named it 'Naked opinion'. I am glad that I m doing justice to this topic. However, thanks a lot for your nice comments. I m signing off for today now with a nice feeling that your comment generated.

Shilpa Garg said...
August 18, 2009 at 10:50 PM

A very thoughtful post!
There are different facets of love!
Read this somewhere...
Love is truth
Love is pure joy
Love is giving freely
Love is a free gift
Love is freedom
Love is powerful
Love is amazing
Love is considering and honoring others...
their whole being - ideas, beliefs, feelings...
Love is unconditional
Love is awesome
Love is respectful!! :)

Shankar said...
August 19, 2009 at 9:07 AM

hi..bharathi...all the above you mentioned is love...Love is embedded in each and every human being...

We express it in different ways to different persons through out our life time....

I think none can exist without love....

Bharathi said...
August 19, 2009 at 9:26 AM

@Shilpa: Thanks Shilpa. I also read this before and admire it. Thanks fo sharing it here as others will also have a chance to read it.

@Shankar: Yeah, I too beleive love is embedded within every one. Thanks pal.

Mr.R aka Lakshmi Rajan said...
August 19, 2009 at 10:07 AM

There is selfless love , there is selfish love and then there is love by bond , love without bond..

Love varies in degrees and nature but the bottom line is WE LOVE. We don't say its calculated love . So just love , keep loving without analysing. Your rebel is right. Love , accept love , acknowledge love , give back love.

Bharathi said...
August 19, 2009 at 11:33 AM

@ Mr. R. Thanks for your comments. Its very Empathizing.

Shruti said...
August 19, 2009 at 7:51 PM

Hi Bharathi,
check out my blog!
you have been tagged..

keep smiling

Indian Pundit said...
August 19, 2009 at 8:14 PM

Hi Bharathi

Absolutely brilliant post.
Love comes in all kinds of flavours.

Just enjoy the feeling without much analysis..!!

Cheers friend. Good read.

ABHISHEK SiM said...
August 19, 2009 at 8:44 PM

enlightening. good post!

Bharathi said...
August 20, 2009 at 7:43 AM

@IP: Thanks a lot for your nice comment pal.

@ Abishek Sim: I am glad that you liked it. keep visiting. Thanks.

Bharathi said...
August 20, 2009 at 7:43 AM

@Shruthi: Will check.

Shruti said...
August 21, 2009 at 4:02 PM

HI Bharathi
Check out my new 55Fiction and give me your feedback

Vipul Grover said...
August 21, 2009 at 8:36 PM

The only thing I am good at is 'writing truth'. that is quite simple. just write what ever comes to your mind. Its easy isnt it.
Yup, tht's d easiest nd d best thing 2 do.. Whatevr u write, watevr u say, be honest; thr r always othrs 2 add 2 ur knowledge if u lack sumwhere.. thts d beauty of blogging :)

Bharathi said...
August 21, 2009 at 8:47 PM

@ Vipul: You are absoutely right. My knowledge widened after I started blogging.

Rane (The Orchid with All Shades Pink) said...
August 22, 2009 at 12:41 AM

totally enjoyed reading this one..


Bharathi said...
August 22, 2009 at 10:24 AM

@Rane: Thanks pal. I am glad that you liked it.

Arif Tak said...
August 22, 2009 at 10:23 PM

hey Bharthi..this blog of urs is like Vikram Vaital.. asking questions at the end :)

Nice insight, whatever you mentioned are different colors of love that a person experience during course of his life...

To me love is Divine. no matter which form it takes... Be it
1. Your first love..
2. Love of parents or you being parent or a friend...
3. Loving oneself (in case of stranger helping you.)

The stranger who helped you out of now where was in love with himself and would not have been able to live with the feeling of guilt that he could not save two young boys from a group of violent people... that is love too. but towards whom ???
how can you love someone whom you do not even know...it has to be something else...

Bharathi said...
August 24, 2009 at 8:03 PM

@ Arif:

I actually dont know who Vikram Vaital is. (who is he by the way). But I am sure you are complementing. Thanks.

I agree with your comment.

You said : "how can you love someone whom you do not even know.."

I have an answer for this.

It is actually easy to love whom you dont know than whom you know well.

I believe that is how most people love God. They dont know who he is. So it is easy to love. If they know who he is and if they have to live with him, then it would be hard to love him I guess. LOL.

Sat_hi_sh said...
August 25, 2009 at 12:07 AM

love is all around us bharathi..from the day beginning till the day ends ,love fills us ,for without it we are no more then machines...

do watch the film "LOVE ACTUALLY" which i have put up in my blog...u'll definitely have a smile coz of the love in the film :)

Bharathi said...
August 25, 2009 at 9:12 AM

@ Sathish: Thanks for commenting. I have that movie with me but not yet watched. Will watch soon.

Singh Amit said...
September 14, 2009 at 7:24 PM

Really a touching and thought provoking post....:)
In the domain of Science, there are only two things, known and unknown whereas in domain of religion there is known, unknown and never-known. I feel, love comes in never-known. It is very difficult for me to realize what Love is; or how it can be discriminated from the very emotion, we feel in day to day life as I am not familiar with every dimension of life. However, I feel that love is a catalyst that enhances the pleasure of life.
Love is realized in moments or it can be our nature, is a very critical question. One can not deny the feeling you have explained is not love but don't you feel, it is in moments? Can we not expand these moments or is it the vital nature of love? I do not know, but may be, Expansion of these moments are regarded as enlightment. There is wide differences in the philosopher to term 'love' as a state or a mutual emotion. Is love always connected with someone or is it our subtle nature? In common terminology, we always need someone to love, even, people need god to love this existence. If we try to explore, thousand questions starts rumbling and finally all explanation seems to futile. Seeing the great and mystical arrangement of whole universe, I feel, love is the part of same arrangement. But you know, we human being always try to find an explanation of the things, without caring, it is known or never-known.
Thanks a lot for making me to understand... :)
"Stop analyzing and start loving"

Anonymous said...
October 18, 2009 at 2:26 PM

With utmost satisfaction, i would like to inform you that this post of yours has been selected as a suiting piece to honor my newly installed wall of fame.
So, I would like you to take out some of your precious time and gimme a small writeup introducing this post in about 40-50 words to mail address:rahul938@gmail.com
I would also appreciate it if you could nominate some more posts(including yours) which can be pinned up on my wall.

yours truly

Makk said...
April 22, 2011 at 7:50 PM

That was satisfying...I dont know in what way.

keep writing.

Bharathi said...
April 29, 2011 at 9:18 AM

Thanks Makk

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